(Costco is often forced to close its doors on Sundays.)
Yesterday, I woke up at 10 a.m. and drank a cup of genuine Coca-Cola. I'm still at The Queen Elephant's house, so I don't always have access to freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. The Chinese powers-that-be are now allowing their citizens to have more than one baby. Consequently, lots of older ladies are showing up pregnant at the local hospitals. This is causing problems because age and birth-defects often go hand-in-hand.
Miz Perfect asked me to go with her to Costco. I agreed. I didn't have much choice. I try to keep the peace. The Queen Elephant came with us. She drove us to downtown Daejeon in her brand new Audi. The volume of the navigation system gave me a splitting headache. Somehow, my mother-in-law screwed things up by playing with the buttons.
My wife forgot it was Sunday. Costco was closed. Major retail chains are forced to shut their doors two Sundays per month. The Korean government passed this law so that smaller supermarkets could make an extra buck or two.
The Queen Elephant offered to pay for lunch. We went to an all you can eat barbecue joint. I ate lots of pork. In Korea, the customers cook their own meat right at the table. It's actually a lot of fun.
(Eating in Korea is fun.)
Miz Perfect said, "Do you want da soju?"
"No. I'll just have water."
It was too early for soju. I don't like to drink until after six p.m.
The meal was delicious. I stuffed my face like a filthy pagan. The juice from the meat ran down my fat chin and stained my clothing.
My wife gave me the stink-eye. "You da pig."
I didn't return her insult. Instead, I just smiled like a retarded infant. I'm wonderful that way.
We finished our meal and drove to a butcher shop. Miz Perfect bought a ton of beef for me and Rice-Boy Larry. We didn't eat it yesterday. We were too busy watching Vikings, and neither of us was hungry. So I'll prepare it tonight when I get home.
The Queen Elephant's house is pretty much empty for the next day or so. Therefore, I have the run of the place. Perhaps I'll get drunk as I feast. That sounds like a good plan.
Anyway, God bless everybody. I'll talk to you later.