Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Read the book

(I'm currently writing my opus.)

It's always been my dream to be a professional writer ever since I was a kid. But I just haven't been blessed with enough talent to make a go of it. With that said, I'm giving it one more shot. I'm 54,000 words into my memoirs. I should reach 80,000 by January. 80,000 words is the optimal length for a first time novelist.

I plan to revise the text during the month of February. You know, clean up the typos and some of the sloppy sentences. But I don't want to revise it too much. I want the final manuscript to be raw. After that, I'm going to publish my opus on Amazon. It will be out by March. I'm charging a dollar per download. If the book sells more than 10,000 copies, then I'll keep on writing. If not, I plan to break all my pencils.

I no longer want to blog. This might sound crazy, but I want to be recognized as an artist rather than a blogger. However, come back in March,--if you're interested--and I'll give you the details on how to purchase the book. Thanks for your support. And God bless everybody.


  1. for the blog followers who are going through withdrawal, check out the alternatives to this one by searching for eating horse in france, eating bear in alaska, eating people in Sierra Leone, and eating pufferfish in japan.

    best wishes with the writing.

    here's Julia Child with horse bowel pate:

  2. Sooooo.......we ain't eating dog in china no mo??

  3. Will part with a 1.00 if the whole 80K of words are not about reading the paper while taking a dump. Then only 999,999 more to go

  4. Bummer. I've enjoyed your blog since I discovered it about a year ago. Haven't read a book in well over a year due to the simple fact that I don't want to invest that much time into one piece of reading material. The book has gone the way of the movie in that movies have been replaced by 30-60 minute weekly TV shows. Movies and books have been replaced by shorter versions that meet the dying attention spans of today's audience.

  5. Good luck with the writing Mr. Smith. I will miss your blog... it was always high art in my humble opinion.

    Mr. Benge

  6. Did you put your email somewhere?

    Hard to reach you now that the blog is asleep.

    This just in: some kid from LA is staying in your hotel. he was caught stealing in shanghai.

    go find his room. introduce yourself. read to him from the bible.
    Ephesians 4:28, NLT: "If you are a thief, quit stealing."

    also explain to him about the fornications and how Psalm 7:11 God is angry with the wicked every day.

    so that really sort of sums it all up.

    plus it will be a good addition to your book. and you will be making friends with the big baller brand. and also saving a lost soul. and also the diplomacy.

    you were put in shanghai for a Purpose, and now that Purpose has become clear.

    glory upon the highest.

    here's the Ruang Xue Mountaineers with "Happy Goes to Beautiful Joyous"

  7. great job with getting the ucla players released form shanghai prison

    there are opportunities like this all around us to bring the blessings of the holy writ into the lives of the populaces, like the blog has done. the old days of cutting of the thieving hand are replaced with the blockchain of intercessions.

    here's Pretty Pretty Dancing Club with "joyousness of our friends"

    glorious on high

  8. liangello ball, donald trump, lavare ball, and pres xii thanked mister smith for taking the time to pray together with liangello and talk about the salvific redemptivity of the saviour in terms of theft and shoplifting, which has led international diplomacing on a world stage.

    the fiasco of the shanghai imprisonation of the american ball family was averted because of the diligint effort of the eating dong blog, which a lot of people don't know about it yet. but on behalf of the people of the planet and korea, a big think you and best wishes with your book. you might want to look into a job with the state department in the future or else it could be the diplomatic corps. your pick.

    read all about it

    there is a patreon page to raise money for a pair of louie vitton sunglasses for mister smith's rice boys as a way of saying thank you and also for the dragon queen in a style for the ladies.

    here is a treat for the blog readers while they await the book about eating dogs


  9. alot of readers aren't able to wait very well until the eating dog book comes out in the march timeframe. and so there is a need for some interim updates which is what this post is fulfillment thereof.

    yesterday the pigeon master and I went to hollywood to see the circus. we ate at the Master of Delights. I ordered the veal. it was heaven. the pigeon master said, no eata the veal withouta the napkin, then tucked a wad of paper towels in my shirt just below my throat. I thought I was being choked to death. this is not the first time that has happened.

    I washed down the veal with a pint of rum. I'm a gutter dweller that way. the meal set me back eighty bucks. mister blister-farm said do they got any good desserts here.

    I switched on the youtube and watched pastor macarthur talk about whether jesus spoke in tongues. aramaic is a tongue of yore. so is hebrew. and latin. they are the tongues of yore. but nowdays people on the tv shows are saying "ma shalla bim bam! gulalla fee rimsico! wee smo!" as if these are the forgotten tongues of yore. however they are not forgotten. nor are they of yore.

    in the book of the hoseans, the people start saying to the mountains, "Cover us!" and to the hills, "Fall on us!" they say it in paleohebrew. but when jesus said to the book of luke that they will say to the mountains, "Fall on us!" and to the hills, "Cover us!" that is when the women mourned and wailed for him because they didn't understand about speaking in tongues.

    this has caused a lot of turmoil in the churches of today. "wuh amuru lu hareem ka soonoo", which congregations don't say that enough during their praise medleys because instead they are busy doing it greek style like "arxontai legein tois oresin Pesete eph’ hemas". which is sort of tongue-like, but more of a fake-tongue which is of the devil. and that is the problem with the church today, which you can read more about it on the macarther youtubes and patreon kickstartme for a monthly lovegift of a fraction of bitcoin.

    the newspapers are about another genocide which is how racial purity is bestowed in order to make the land belong to the people. I read it while I drank my coffee on the crapper. I don't put cream in it or sugar, just black coffee and a cigarette. sometimes I flip on the tv while I'm idling on the john in case macarthurvision is showing. or else the local news.

    I said some prayers in latin which is how they were written and bended the knee as per usual. I am not the heathen they say I am. and then slept the sleep of the dreamless believers who know what it means to trust in the goodness of bountiful mercies.

    here is lead zepalin with "owner of a lonely heart"

    peace upon the highest.

  10. Heck, "I'd buy that for a dollar!" (Robocop reference).

    I will purchase if you get it done. I have enjoyed yer humor over time and hope you do well.

  11. Hey check out this guy- he writes using his blog. Oddball but check his site numbers- guy is breaking out after 20yrs


    his site:http://www.jameslafond.com/

  12. it's always xmas somewhere in the world, and that is what this blog is doing. maybe that will be what the book is about, how it's always xmas in asia and so forth.

    but not enough of the xmas songs on the radio and the shopping stores are singing lyrics from the first of john.

    whatever it was that was at the start.
    whatever it was that we could hear.
    whatever it was that we laid eyes on,
    looked at,
    held on,
    it was 'bout the word word word of life.
    uh huh.
    come on.

    say it with me.
    the word word word of life.

    uh huh.

    and you know it, how the life appeared.
    we seen it, we seen it,
    and sayin that forever-life
    with big big daddy
    got showed to us.

    hang out! oh yeah.
    hang out with us!
    uh uh.
    hang out with big big daddy
    and his boy jay cee, uh huh.
    hang out!

    we just saying it,
    we gotta be saying it,
    make us so glad.
    yippee eye yo.

    a live performance by the Go-Go's (a girl band from the 80s) is online where they do a pretty rocking job of performing the song in front of a live audience. also you can see that they didn't shave their underarm hair, which might bother some of the readers of this blog. but maybe not the book.


    peace on the earth in the highest for the new year

  13. Thank for opening the blog again Smith, miss your writing and look forward to the book.

  14. Just wanted to tell u about a website that monetizes blog posting and articles etc. Its based on cryptocurrency so is as anonymous as u want it to be.

    Check it out.


    Even if you do just want to drum up interest for a book its a good place to do so.